Life-Changing Decisions: Anna’s Story

I have all that I need within me to make the very BEST decision (not the perfect one) for me right now.

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I paced the matted tan carpet in our rental’s bedroom. One hand on my eight-months-pregnant belly, the other hand death-gripping my cell phone to my ear. “How do I know I am making the right decision?” I asked my first business coach, Lacey Sites.

I was contemplating quitting my job as a mental health therapist to go full-time in my coaching business. Just six months before, I was hanging my first flyers around town advertising my life-coaching workshop at a local coffee shop. Just six months before, I was Googling, “Is it ethical to do life coaching when you’re a therapist?” Just six months before, I was hitting "go live" for the first time from my living room couch.

In that moment of decision, I was thinking of all the worst-case scenarios, like what if I quit my job and couldn’t make things work. I never dreamed I would fully book my business in only a few months, much less sell out in advance all my available coaching spaces for after I returned from maternity leave.

For a moment, time stood still… and so did my 2-year-old, looking up at me with big green eyes.

Even though we were on the phone, I could imagine Lacey looking right at me as she said, “Anna, there is no PERFECT decision. There are trade-offs to every decision. What is the BEST decision right now for you and your family?”

Be still my heart.

I knew the answer immediately.

That was the moment I truly owned being an entrepreneur, and I’ve never looked back.

I didn’t know it at the time, but Lacey’s reminder to pick the best over the “perfect” decision would help me make dozens of powerful, challenging, life-changing and business-changing decisions over the next five years.

This was the first. Being there for my two children while they were little was a huge priority. On top of motherhood, I didn’t want to struggle to balance my therapy day job and my coaching business.

With tears in my eyes, I told my boss and mentor Bev (who lovingly called my business my “side hustle” and let me use the office from 5-8 am before work for my coaching) that I wouldn’t be returning to work.

That day, I learned to be okay with trade-offs that happen with even the BEST decisions.
That day, I learned that the faster I made decisions, even hard ones, the faster my business would grow.
That day, I learned that I could trust myself in change and transition.

Change–even good change–is almost always uncomfortable.

That’s exactly why I encourage my clients to get good at managing discomfort, normalizing it for them and celebrating it with them–instead of avoiding it.

Business is a series of uncomfortable decisions.

The more I built my self-trust, the faster I was able to make profitable decisions as the CEO of my business.

Flash back a few months earlier, to one of my very first business decisions: picking one clear marketing message to stick with for 90 days.

I didn’t want to pick the wrong thing and waste time, so ironically I wasted over three months of time not picking.

Yes, in some ways it was miserable… but it also felt safe.

Researching, strategizing, making charts–it all felt productive. But underneath the busy work, I was paralyzed about making the wrong decision. And before too long, I felt exhausted, spinning my wheels but not going anywhere.

Since then, I realized that any decision is better than no decision. Why? Whatever I decide, the subsequent action I take gives me important data. Usually I pick right, but even when I pick wrong I trust myself to make a new decision with new data. The decisions just continue from there.

Early decisions I made in my business:

Deciding on one clear business model.
Deciding on one marketing message.
Deciding on one compelling offer to sell.
Deciding on one platform to get visible.
Deciding on one simple sales strategy.

Decisions I made a few years into business:

Deciding to narrow my program suite to one core program to scale my business.
Deciding to let go of six contractors to have one right-hand assistant.
Deciding to launch a group program.
Deciding to continue investing in coaching and team support in my business and at home.
Deciding to raise my prices.

What’s a decision in your business you are facing right now? Let me help you prepare to make that best possible decision. Here is my six-step framework to walk you through the discomfort of making the decision, so you can move forward and take action.

Name the Decision. What is the decision at hand? (i.e. quitting my job, choosing my niche, what program to launch, breaking up with a boyfriend). How will I know when it’s time to make the decision?
Get Clear on Fears. What is making this decision challenging? What feels most at stake with this decision?
Come Up with Options. What are my options? Are there actually multiple decisions that I can separate out? (i.e. should I sell my house? Should I move? Should I buy?) What questions do I have for myself?
Create a Deadline. Does it feel supportive to create a deadline so that I have some time to think but not so much time that the decision feels paralyzing? Set it here!
Find Support. What tools do I like to use to make decisions? (i.e. talking to friends, praying, time in silence, journaling, creating a pro and con list). How can I best feel supported in making this decision?
Stick to it for 90 days. You might question your decision on Day 3, but resist the temptation to re-assess. Indecisiveness is frustrating, but it’s also familiar and safe. Once you decide, don’t look back–trust the version of you that decided. Put ALL of your energy on the action and not the re-deciding, questioning and re-assessing.

Remember: it’s better to make a decision–even the wrong decision–and get momentum, than to stay stuck and safe.

→ What is your biggest takeaway from this blog?

→ What action step are you going to take?

→ What is a decision you are currently facing?

→ Journal about a time you listened to your gut and made the right decision.

→ Journal about a time you made the “wrong” decision and learned from it.

Dig Deeper: Client Exercise

On a recent mastermind call, my client Emma was making a big decision.

She was stuck, overwhelmed and nearly in tears.

I asked her to choose two of her mastermind friends, one to represent each of the decisions she was deciding between. She would tell them each what to say so that she could take a step back and observe her decision process from a distance.

Emma: Okay, Sophia: you are the part of me that wants to quit my job. Say, “I know it’s time to quit my job”

Sophia: “Emma, it’s time for you to quit your job.”

Emma: Julia, you are the part of me that wants to stay in my job. Say, “But what if all of this success you’ve had in your business in the last few months is a fluke?”

Julia: “Emma, have you considered that all of this success might be temporary? It’s just a fluke.”

When Emma was paralyzed in the decision, this exercise helped her to get out of her head and out of fear/survival mode to access her intuition and listen to what she was actually thinking and feeling. Through this exercise, she was able to give a real tangible voice to each of the two arguments. Relief washed over her face as she listened to the voice she felt most aligned with.

After Emma processed for twenty minutes, she decided to quit her job for a better-fitting job that gave her more time in the summer to pursue her business dreams.

Instead of stuffing down one side of the argument, give it a voice! Listen to each side from a place of detachment so you can approach the decision with a calm, clear CEO mindset.

Don’t be afraid to get support from a coach when it comes to making a big decision.

For me, investing in coaching support has helped me make decisions and, even more importantly, stick to them with confidence because I never feel like I’m going it alone.